What Day is it, Anyway?… Day 5? It seems like it was two weeks ago that I put a book out. I’m kind of thinking maybe it needed to be longer. Obviously it was lacking in content. Why else would I be hit with a topic that I need to learn about in a hurry, and a disease that many have questions about that I have to be the damned “chosen one” to explain! This goes above and beyond reason! All that know me well will expect to hear the Next set of words come tumbin’ out…”This? Is Ridiculous!” So let me begin with what I’ve learned that still hasn’t stuck yet: I’m not good with directions so I’ve avoided paperwork, and the first thing I’ve discovered is there are Students, that talk, talk and talk some more because it makes them feel important! Nothing wrong with feeling special as along as you’re offering the correct info to the patient. Then there are “Residents” who seem smarter than the students, but you need to be careful of what you ask because while they’re Not Students, they’re still not as smart as Doctors. Let’s not skip over the “Fellow.” WTF is a Fellow? A good old chap? By the time you’re done processing who’s who and who’s said What, you may want to climb back up on the surgery table and ask everyone to start over! THIS TIME though, you want Labels on your parts taken OUT and parts that are being Fixed. One Person told me what ever cancer is left, after they look at the path slides next week, I’ll be in pain again from the New cancer. I said, “I was never in pain from the Old Cancer! Why would it hurt this go-round?” Fellow came in tonight and after I relayed this passed on info, she said, “That was a Student talking- IGNORE them!” What? I’m not in the habit of ignoring medical people and I’m almost wishing now that they’d wear colored name tags to determine who sits in what chair? If you ever find yourself with a million questions don’t take the word of anyone who is NOT your Doctor! OMG, these people are almost as bad as jocks in the radio industry! We all just want to be heard. I’ve learned that the Doctor wants me to get through 2 rounds of double-dipping chemo, but with the hope that I’ll manage 6 rounds! So Now I have to wonder if I can beat the odds and go the distance just for the principal of it, or if I should just expect to get through 2 rounds and be happy. This one takes the cake: My mom thought my surgery was NEXT Monday! So she never called the day of! If it didn’t hurt to laugh, I’d be howling! It’s good to laugh on paper. My kids can’t believe that my husband who I’m separated from for 5 years now, is the one that came in to be with me. Five kids uttering, “Mom? What’s Wrong with you guys??’ Like… where did Dad sleep??” Ok. The facts for those women that wonder: A. Always look to see if you’re bleeding especially after menopause, B. Watch for bloating for no reason. C. Keep track of UTI’s. D. If you need a hysterectomy it may be from cancer- they don’t always know what kind. Let them run labs, blood work, biopsies… whatever they need to do- Don’t get in the way! Lastly keep your sense of humor. It’s rare that you get the opportunity to laugh but when you do? Use it to the hilt! It feels so good to feel as though you’re beating the odds! One more thing: Sorry! don’t be afraid to ask questions! Just be sure to ask the right person!